Human beings are amazing. It has taken millions of years of evolution to mould us into what we are today. But now I believe we are going backwards.
And it is all the fault of modern technology. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if, within a couple of decades, we lose the power of speech.
“I need to find out if Beth is getting a lift to school,” my daughter said the other day, “But I can’t text her – my phone has no credit.”
I suggested that she call her on our landline, and even lifted the phone from its cradle to hand to her. She looked at it with horror, as though I’d suggested a carrier pigeon.
“I’m not ringing her house, I just want to text her,” she said, before asking to borrow my phone. I asked her why and she muttered something about talking privately.
Neither of my daughters use the house phone, everything is done by text. I’ve often suggested they call people when they can’t get a response, but they never do. They’ve such an aversion to using the phone it crossed my mind that perhaps I’m bringing up two undercover MI5 agents posing as children.
It is not only youngsters who prefer not to talk. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve said to my colleague: “There is everything on this website except a contact number.”
Often, when you’re looking for customer services, you get everything except a phone number. You get e-mail addresses, and other website addresses, and FAQs (frequently asked questions). I haven’t yet come across an FAQ that I wanted to ask.
In fact, surveys have shown that more than half of online retailers provide no phone number on their website, and many have no contact address.
I’d like to pass a law dictating that all companies and organisations who make it their business to avoid speaking directly to customers should be banned.
I don’t sign up with or shop with any supplier or retailer that doesn’t have a contact number. But even if they do, you may never reach a human being. One ‘avoid-speaking’ trick is to keep you hanging on for ages, while a recording tells you they are busy, and ‘you will find all the answers you need on our website’.
I recently spent about two hours trying to find a phone number for an online firm. Then when I found one, it was permanently engaged.
Even paying an organisation a visit doesn’t guarantee a proper, human-to-human conversation. I watched in horror the other night, as a ‘virtual receptionist’ at a council office featured on the news.
A virtual neighbour over a virtual hedge will be next.
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