Being a mum is a huge responsibility. It involves a mixture of emotions - ups and downs, anger and calm, happiness and sadness. It can be fun, it can be gruelling. But above all it is immensely satisfying - going all out to do your best for your child. While all mums have admirable qualities, some stand out from the crowd and are an inspiration to others. Helen Mead spoke to Maralyn Adey, who has moved heaven and earth for her son Kristian, who has special needs. And Pamela Wilkinson spoke to brave Debbie Rudding who discovered she was suffering from leukaemia when she was eight months pregnant.

DOTTED AROUND Maralyn Adey's living room are a number of awards - one is a framed qualification for horse riding, others for achievements in speech and drama, and one - a large semi-circular plaque on top of the television - states in bold print 'Child of Achievement.'

As a nearby photograph shows, it was presented by the then Prime Minister John Major and his wife Norma.

These awards are all testament to Maralyn's incredible efforts as a mum. Not forgetting dad Alvin, and, of course, the many talents of the person they all belong to - the couple's son Kristian.

The 15-year-old bounds in to the kitchen of the terraced house in Thackley, Bradford, chattering ten to the dozen about the family cats, and proudly shows me a small wooden easel and blackboard, upon which the words "Reserved, Mr Christian" are written. It was made by a waiter friend for Kristian to use in the pub where the family occasionally dine.

Kristian is a bubbly, happy-go-lucky boy, but his smiles hide the fact that he is seriously ill. Yet Maralyn says if he had been given vital medical treatment as a baby, he would not be suffering as he is. And she says his life expectancy would be much, much greater.

The fight for treatment was the first of many battles to come for Maralyn. When Kristian was three months old doctors diagnosed a heart condition along with lung defects. They were told by specialists at Killingbeck Hospital, Leeds, that surgery was not an option because Kristian suffered from Down's Syndrome.

The family was then directed to Hammersmith Hospital in London, where the same conclusion was drawn. Yet, three years later, they became aware of a case in which a ten-month-old Ilkley baby suffering from Down's Syndrome was given a heart operation in Canada.

After contacting various specialists in Canada, Maralyn spoke to cardiologists in Liverpool, where she discovered that the operation would have been possible.

But, by then, their son was too old, and they were told to their distress, that at that stage his heart would not hold out if his lungs were operated upon, and vice versa.

She says: "If he had had the operation before he was a year old he would be an ordinary Down's child with an ordinary life span of up to 70 or even 80 years. Now that is likely to be 20 at the most."

Maralyn and Alvin are suing the two hospitals involved - Leeds General Infirmary, for Killingbeck, and the National Health Service Litigation Authority which represents Hammersmith - for negligence. They are seven-years into the legal action, and determined to see it through.

It has been tough, yet on top of this fight, Maralyn has pulled out all the stops in a host of other crusades on behalf of the son she adores. She took Bradford Council, for which she works, to a tribunal because her choice of school for Kristian clashed with theirs. After emerging victorious, she then joined forces with another mum, Kathy Allday-Scott, and won a year-long battle to secure transport to take Kristian to the school of her choice because the Council refused.

Says Maralyn: "You battle from day one. You have health to battle with, education to battle with, then transport, and access - places accessible with a wheelchair, because sometimes Kristian will walk only 100 yards maximum."

She adds: "Sometimes it is a nightmare and I feel very angry - things are improving, but extremely slowly."

A community development worker, Maralyn belongs to Bradford Parents Partnership scheme, which helps parents of children with special needs, and she can represent them.

Creativity oozes from every member of the Adey family and, to be sure of tapping into Kristian's - and that of other youngsters with special needs - Maralyn encouraged Valerie Jackson of Bradford-based Stage 84, to start a speech and drama class. Recalls Maralyn: "I rang round everyone and asked if they would do it for the children. I begged and begged, and then Stage 84 said they would."

Kristian loves the class and, in 1996, along with pal Alexander Squires, he was the one of the first Down's Syndrome child in the country to pass exams set by London's Guildhall School of Music and Drama.

Also heavily involved in amateur dramatics, and with a couple of drama teaching qualifications to her name, Maralyn started her own special needs drama classes at Bradford's Priestley Centre for the Arts. "It's been running a year now, on Saturday mornings. The children love it, and we have an end-of-year production," she says.

In April, the whole Adey family is acting in the centre's production of the Merry Wives of Windsor.

Kristian also goes horse riding and recently gained an equestrian certificate. Says Maralyn: "I've tried to open as many doors as possible for him without affecting him health-wise."

She explains that Kristian gets exhausted very quickly, and sometimes turns blue. He has an oxygen supply both at home and at school to help him.

In between her other commitments, the busy mum also found the energy to join two other mums in opening a youth club for children with special needs on Bradford's Thorpe Edge estate. "It is going extremely well," she says, "The kids really enjoy themselves." With cash raised by Bradford and Bronte Rotary Club the mums are this year taking the children to on an outward bound holiday in the Lake District.

Bringing up Kristian has not been easy, but there have been many silver linings to Maralyn's struggles. "It makes extra demands, but it has greatly enhanced our lives. If we wanted something we had to fight. It has made me assertive and I have a wide circle of friends - Kristian speaks to anyone and everyone."

She adds: "It is a disability and it is a harsh one, but it has brought us a wealth of experience. It has brought both good and bad."

She cannot praise Alvin, a West Yorkshire Ambulance Service officer, enough. "He is more laid-back than I am, which is a good thing, and he is a wonderful dad. I cannot fault him. Kristian is a real daddy's boy."

It comes as a shock to discover that Maralyn finds any time for herself. But she does. An accomplished singer, she sings with Wakefield-based Northern Music and Theatre Company. They are performing at the Albert Hall in May and recently sung on the pitch before the Leeds United v Roma match.

"I do the singing - that is my own," she says protectively.

FOR details of Maralyn's Saturday morning drama class ring the Priestley Centre for the Arts on 01274 820666.

I'm so grateful to be here

Debbie Rudding has suffered more in the last 12 months than most of us suffer in a lifetime - and yet she greets you with the sweetest smile and the kind of optimism which is an inspiration to us all.

Last year Debbie's world disintegrated when, in a routine anti-natal check up at eight months pregnant, it was discovered that the tiredness she was experiencing was due to an acute strain of leukaemia.

Blissfully happy with husband Jim and two-year-old son Ben in their cosy house in East Bowling, Bradford, Debbie was thrilled when she became pregnant again. "Everything was going well until the seventh month, when I began getting very tired. Initially I put it down to working full time and looking after Ben." explained Debbie. "I went to the doctors for some iron injections and a subsequent blood test showed up the over-production of white blood cells.

"At first I was too shocked to take in the news. It felt as though it was happening to someone else. All I could think of was my unborn baby, and how could I possibly look after Ben and my husband if I was ill".

The specialists decided to induce the baby five weeks early, so Debbie was taken in hospital immediately. Although premature, Rebecca weighed 5lb. 13oz and did not have to go into the special care unit. "She was born on Monday and I was allowed home briefly on the Thursday for a few days in order to bond with the baby. It was just awful, knowing that I had to go back into hospital for months so soon after she was born. We tried explaining to Ben that Mummy was poorly and that she would soon be back, but he could not understand.

"Right from the start he loved Rebecca and gave her lots of cuddles. My husband took time off work to look after the children and my mother, the family and close friends were absolutely wonderful. I could not have managed without them, but it still nearly destroyed me to have to leave my new baby after a few short days with her. She was so sweet it broke my heart".

Debbie was admitted to Ward Seven - the Annette Fox unit - at the BRI where she began a punishing series of chemotherapy treatments over the next six months. Had the disease not been discovered in the anti-natal check up it could have been fatal, but with treatment the prognosis for that type of leukaemia was good. Her daughter could also have been at risk, but thankfully Rebecca got a clean bill of health, although during the time Debbie was in hospital Rebecca developed an infection and was admitted to St. Luke's.

"I was so low at that time, this was the last straw", said Debbie. "I could not be with her and I felt absolutely useless. However she was soon home again and is now absolutely fine.

"I was in hospital for seven weeks for the first treatments, which included tablets and intravenous injections. At first I did not suffer too much, but the last course made me so ill I did not want the children to see me in case it upset them" said Debbie. "It seemed such a long time. I used to watch television and do my puzzle books - I have always enjoyed crosswords, but the days were very long. I mostly had to stay in my room in case of catching an infection."

Jim brought the children to see her whenever Debbie was fit enough, but he came every day to cheer her up. Her parents and other family were constantly at her bedside, but when her hair began falling out her father was almost more upset than Debbie. "Dad always said it was my crowning glory. When my hair began to rub off in patches I got one of the nurses to shave my head. Back in the ward everyone said I looked like G.I. Jane!"

Brave words from Debbie, but she was undoubtedly very upset. "It was awful, but in comparison to not being with the children, it was not important. Everyone was wonderful to us. It is true that when you are ill, you really find out who your friends are."

Debbie had always been healthy, but from being 14 stone before she became pregnant with Rebecca, she dropped to eight stone. "I simply could not eat the food in hospital. Most of the time I felt too sick. When I was allowed home Jim used to cook my favourite steak and chips."

"I have changed so much in myself as a result of this illness", explained Debbie. "I used to be very quiet and shy, but now find I have become very positive and determined to survive to see my children grow up".

Debbie is now in remission and the signs are promising.

She inspired a fund raising event for the disease while in hospital. A sponsored pub-crawl and charity disco at East Bowling Unity Club raised more than £2,000 for the Annette Fox Unit - and Debbie was able to present the cheque after the events.

Debbie came out of hospital last December. "It was the most wonderful Christmas I have ever had. Being able to share it with Jim and the children was magic. I was just so thankful to be home again with them."

Debbie is taking life one day at a time but she has a fierce determination to conquer the disease. Still suffering from intense tiredness, she is enjoying every moment of her life.

"I was never one for the bright lights although I enjoy a night out at the Unity Club. I am very fortunate to have a wonderful husband and two beautiful children. If I can share their growing up I will be content. If I continue to improve, maybe we could have a short holiday together, as we have never been away. But most of all I am just so thankful to be here".

Converted for the new archive on 30 June 2000. Some images and formatting may have been lost in the conversion.