It is good news for ecologists. Apparently, Cherie Blair is not going to use disposable nappies on her baby who is due to make an appearance this month.
This is all very well for mon Cherie who will never have to wash a terry nappy. (Terry nappy- you know, one of those square towelly white things that are folded into triangles and put under baby's bottoms with safety pins.)
Cherie won't have to change one, let alone wash one. She will no doubt have an army of helpers to assist in the day-to-day caring of the little one at Downing Street. She has already made her intention to carry on working after the birth (and probably during it too knowing how scarily hard-working she is) so she is not going to get bogged down with nappy worries. And what big worries they are.
One of the biggest gripes that olden day mothers had is that they didn't have disposable nappies. Whereas one of the biggest gripes that modern mothers have is that Gripe Water is no longer full of alcohol.
But back to nappies.
When you bring home a nice shiny new baby the only downside is that they fill their nappies. Along with:
a) incessant crying
b) incessant puking
c) incessant pain left over from the birth.
Though it has been some time since Toddler needed nappies I remember all too clearly how difficult it is being a new mum. You have so much to get used to, raging hormones which leave you unable to think straight.
In your normal, pre-baby past you would howl with laughter at the bad acting in Neighbours.
Now you howl with misery because in the brief moment that you were able to watch any interrupted television (i.e. away from incessant, crying, puking, and that's just you, never mind the baby) you've just seen someone stabbed very unconvincingly. You know its bad acting and you know its silly but you can't help weeping buckets.
Now, if you were an old-fashioned mum you could use the same bucket to soak the soggy terries.
What a treat!
You have precious little time as it is because you need to rest between bouts of screaming for no apparent reason.
When you've survived the onslaught of the first few weeks and finally got yourself into some sort of routine the nightmare of teething begins and you have to start all over again with sleepless nights and incessant tears.
At least with disposables you don't need to worry about them any longer. And plus you get those nice peach-coloured and fragrant bags that you pop the soiled mess in.
I know that you can get those re-usable nappies that look disposable but you still have to wash the wretched things.
So let posh mums like Cherie do their bit for Mother Earth by using traditional nappies. We'll do our bit for mothers by condoning disposables.
Converted for the new archive on 30 June 2000. Some images and formatting may have been lost in the conversion.
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