WE’RE well into November, or ‘Movember’, which for those of you who don’t know, is the annual opportunity to shine a light on men’s health and, more specifically, mental health.

This global movement began in 2003 when two friends in Australia decided to grow moustaches to raise awareness and funds for men’s health issues like prostate cancer, testicular cancer, and suicide prevention. Since then, Movember has grown significantly, with participants across the globe using the moustache as a visible symbol of support for men’s health, including of course, mental health.

The reluctance of men to discuss their mental health is a complex issue. Traditionally, men have been conditioned to embody a strong, self-reliant image, suppressing their emotions and avoiding vulnerability. This ‘strong and silent’ archetype can lead men to bottle up their feelings, fearing judgment or ridicule if they express their struggles. They may not want to be perceived as weak by their partners, friends, family or colleagues. Add to that, the fact that mental health in general is still greatly stigmatised, particularly for men.

Seeking help for mental health issues can be perceived as a sign of failure, reinforcing the notion that men should be able to handle their problems independently. Expressions such as ‘man-up’ or ‘grow a pair’ are not helpful. They just add to the stigma, which can deter men from reaching out for support, even when they are really struggling.

Reported cases of men with depression are lower than they are for women. Yet, for every female suicide there are three males who take their own life. The suicide rate in the UK increased again in 2023. Given the above, it is safe to say that men do not talk enough about their thoughts or feelings. Many don’t even know where to start, this can add to feelings of isolation and overwhelm.

To break down these barriers, we need to challenge traditional masculine norms and encourage open conversations about mental health. Of course, this can be easier said than done, however, we need to start somewhere.

As part of my work as a therapist and trainer, I recently headed some focus groups for older men over in Lancashire. I asked them how we could get men to talk more openly about their thoughts and feelings. They came up with some interesting suggestions:

* Normalise the Conversation: Open and honest conversations about mental health can help reduce stigma. Encourage open dialogue with friends, family, and colleagues, and create a safe space for men to share their feelings without fear of judgment. Many of the men suggested that their employers could perhaps help with this by facilitating men’s talking groups.

* Challenge Traditional Masculinity: Many of the men I spoke with suggested we need to have a bigger conversation about what it means to be a man in today’s society. A large proportion of them said we should do more to encourage men to embrace their emotions, seek support when needed, and prioritise their mental well-being.

* Promote Self-Care: High on the list was a need to encourage men to prioritise self-care activities such as exercise, mindfulness, and spending time in nature. These practices can help reduce stress, improve mood, and enhance overall mental health. Some wellness activities such as mindfulness are often seen as feminine, or even a bit ‘woo-woo’, and may be generally dismissed by men, meaning they are missing out on the potential benefits.

Great strides have been made in recent years, with organisations like Andy’s Man Club, who offer safe spaces for men to talk openly about their feelings and connect with others who understand their experiences. They have meetings throughout West Yorkshire, on a Monday evening. You can find out details of your nearest one at andysmanclub.co.uk or find them on Facebook.

If you’d like to talk to somebody in confidence, call CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably) on 0800 585858. They are open every evening from 5pm to midnight.

If you run any type of local support group which helps people with their mental health and well-being, then I’d love to hear from you so that I can include details in a future column.

Please remember there is no need to struggle on your own, there is lots of help available locally. To find mental health support across Bradford District and Craven, visit healthyminds.services and use the “support finder”.

If you are in a mental health crisis and need urgent help, please call 0800 952 1181 to speak with First Response. When a First Response telephone assessment indicates a need for a face-to-face assessment, they will aim to see you within four hours.

You can also find emotional and confidential support by calling Guide-Line on 08001 884 884 or chat online at mindinbradford.org.uk/chat (8am to 12am).

* Martin Furber is a therapist qualified in various modalities and an Instructor Member of Mental Health First Aid England. Email wellbeing@martinfurber.com