SUNSHINE, holidays, freedom, promises of blissful escape. Yet, for many, the anticipation of a long-awaited break can morph into summer stress.

It seems counterintuitive, doesn’t it? Shouldn’t the things we crave the most bring us joy and happiness?

The answer lies in the fascinating interplay between our two main brain systems: the emotional brain and the intellectual brain. Our emotional brain, honed by millennia of evolution, is a vigilant protector. It operates on a simple principle - threat or no threat. The down-side of this is that any change, even the positive kind like a summer holiday, is a red flag. Change disrupts our familiar routines, the very things that make us feel secure.

Meanwhile, our intellectual brain, the more analytical counterpart, recognises the potential benefits of a summer break: relaxation, rejuvenation, and reconnection. The problem arises when faced with any type of perceived threat, the intellectual brain often gets sidelined.

So, summer isn’t the only culprit. This battle between our two brain systems plays out in many exciting life events. Here are other examples:

* The Dream Job: Landing your dream job is fantastic! But the pressure to perform, the unfamiliar environment, and the fear of failure can trigger significant stress. Your emotional brain sees the potential social rejection and financial instability as a threat, while your intellectual brain knows the career advancement opportunities outweigh the risks.

* Wedding Bells: Walking down the aisle? Wonderful! But the whirlwind of planning, navigating family dynamics, and the weight of societal expectations can feel overwhelming. The emotional brain fears the unknown and potential criticism, while the intellectual brain recognises the joy of commitment and building a life with your partner.

* Newborn Arrival: A baby! Pure joy, right? Absolutely! However, the sleep deprivation, constant worry and major life adjustment can push even the most prepared parents to their limits. The emotional brain sees the vulnerability and responsibility as threats, while the intellectual brain understands the profound love and fulfilment a child brings.

It’s not just summer holiday, any significant change, even the positive kind, can trigger stress. This is because our emotional brain is wired for survival, prioritising safety over potential rewards. So, how do we bridge the gap between these two brain systems and ensure that exciting life events don’t become stress-fests? Here are a few tips:

* Acknowledge the Stress: Denial is the enemy of progress. Recognise that even positive change can stir up anxiety. Validate your feelings and remind yourself that these are simply your primal instincts trying to keep you safe.

* Plan and Prepare: Our intellectual brain thrives on structure. Whether it’s a loose holiday plan, a wedding budget, or a baby on its way, creating some framework can alleviate the anxiety of the unknown.

* Communicate Openly: Talking things through, whether with a partner, family, or friends, helps calm the emotional brain and allows the intellectual brain to problem-solve effectively.

* Practice Self-Care: Stress takes a toll. Prioritise activities that nourish your mind, body, and spirit. Whether it’s yoga, meditation, spending time in nature, or simply getting enough sleep, self-care sends a message to your emotional brain that you’re actively taking steps to manage the perceived “threat.”

* Focus on the Present: The emotional brain lives in the present moment, fixated on immediate threats. Mindfulness practices like meditation and deep breathing can help anchor you in the present, allowing you to savour the joy of the exciting experience, whether it’s that summer getaway or your significant life event.

Remember, change, even positive change, will trigger a reaction from your emotional brain. By understanding this internal battle and employing strategies to bridge the gap, we can prevent stress from hijacking the exciting moments in life. After all, shouldn’t those long-awaited adventures and milestones be exactly that: adventures and milestones filled with happiness and well-being?

So, as you prepare for your summer vacation, or anything else major and out of the ordinary, a little understanding of your brain goes a long way. By acknowledging the emotional response, planning ahead, and prioritising self-care, you can ensure that you’re better equipped to cope with, and enjoy your plans.

* I love hearing from my readers, if you’d like me to cover any particular aspect of mental health and well-being, please drop me a line. If you run a support group or activity to help people with their mental health and well-being around the Bradford area, then get in touch.

Please note: If you feel you are in a mental health crisis or emergency and may be in danger of causing harm to yourself or others then please contact your GP, go to A&E, call the Samaritans on 116 123 or text SHOUT to 85258

* Martin Furber is a therapist qualified in various modalities and an Instructor Member of Mental Health First Aid England wellbeing@martinfurber.com