WE are, it is said, a nation of DIY enthusiasts. Or, in many cases, DIY bodgers, but many householders at least give it a go.
Not me. I didn’t get the DIY memo. I can change a lightbulb, hang pictures and unblock my shower plughole, and I can paint walls and maybe a door (none of that wiping down and sanding first though) and that’s about it.
I have never bled a radiator, attempted grouting, cleared the guttering, tackled a leaky tap, painted a ceiling, or done any wallpapering. I used to know how to change a plug, but I’ve since forgotten which wire goes where.
I know there are countless YouTube videos for all of the above, but I doubt I’d be able to follow them. I don’t have much common sense, and I have zero enthusiasm for DIY.
I have a long list of things that need doing in my house. There’s mould on the bathroom window. There’s a draught/damp issue in one of the kitchen cupboards. My lounge and bathroom desperately need painting. My carpet requires some kind of industrial cleaning machine. And I try not to think about the sinister damp patch behind the bookcase. I live in fear of a water leak. I don’t even know where the stopcock is.
I’m quite tidy and I keep up with housework, at least on a surface level, but the thought of home maintenance makes my heart sink. I’m not alone. Research from HomeServe suggests the dreaded “to-do” list may be particularly long for some people. A survey by the home assistance provider found that, over the past two years, 40per cent of us haven’t unblocked a drain, nearly a third haven’t bled radiators, and only half have checked pipes for leaks. Less than half those surveyed have draught-proofed their home.
These are the kind of tasks many of us put off, but this can lead to bigger issues. The Association of British Insurers reported a surge in burst pipe claims at the start of this year. Insulating pipes, even wrapping them in a towel for a quick fix, may prevent a costly breakage, says HomeServe. Sealing gaps in windows, doors and walls and insulating the loft reduces the load on the heating system. I have a loft, but I’ve never actually been in it. If I want anything from it I send my nephews up there, like Victorian chimney sweep kids.
It’s not just procrastination getting in the way of tackling home maintenance jobs - three in 10 people in HomeServe’s research say they don’t have the know-how.
I certainly don’t have the know-how, despite coming from a family of DIY enthusiasts. My dad was always tinkering about doing mending and maintenance jobs round the house and my mum could wallpaper a room or upholster a set of chairs in the blink of an eye.
My sister loves a home maintenance challenge; she refused to get a plumber in when her kitchen sink was blocked; instead she went to a DIY store, bought a length of piping and replaced the old one under the sink. She simply worked out how to do it. Weirdly, she actually enjoys tasks like sealing the bath and assembling flatpack furniture. Her pride and joy is her tool box. I bought her a drill for Christmas. Her sons have her DIY gene - one of them built his own bed when he was about 12.
My brother recently revamped his bathroom; he installed a wash basin, taps, shower and bath panel, tiled the walls and laid a floor. I wouldn’t even know how to fit a toilet seat. He's building decking next. “I’m not paying someone to do it if I can do it myself,” he said. He’s right, of course, but if I could afford it I would happily pay someone to do all my odd jobs.
I just don’t have the nouse for any of it. Or the enthusiasm. I can hover about, holding a hammer/screwdriver/little bowls filled with nuts and bolts, while other people get on with DIY jobs, and I can make cups of tea, and that’s as useful as I get. I’m just not the practical, sleeves-rolled-up type.
With the Easter holidays approaching, many of us will be getting around to tackling those jobs we’ve been putting off. I’ve decided to finally paint the bathroom. I’ve got bathroom-friendly paint, and a roller (I bought them six months ago) and sealant. How hard can it be?
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