LONELINESS has been an unprecedented issue over the last 12 months as we have battled the coronavirus and been forced to isolate from friends and family.

And, for many this winter, it will be even lonelier with men, in particular, struggling with their mental health. Suicide among males is the leading cause of death according to the Office for National Statistics.

Jack (not his real name) was plunged into so much despair after losing his beloved wife that he contemplated suicide.

“My wife died more than ten years ago from Multiple Sclerosis and I went to a very dark place. My physical health suffered- I have diabetes anyway and the neglect resulted in me having to have a number of operations. I also suffered a second stroke- the first of which happened in 2000.

“These events have left me with permanent open wounds to my lower legs which is one of the reasons I never went out.

“I had on a number of occasions contemplated suicide as I felt, having been very active and outgoing before my wife became ill, that I had no future to look forward to. I was also in constant pain and suicide seemed to be a way to stop all that.”

He was relatively young only in his 40s when his wife passed and when he was being attended to by a ‘social prescriber’ he was encouraged to go out and about.

“She took me to the Oakworth Shed, a community centre where people meet up every Friday morning to do different activities. This was the first time I had left the house in more than 14 months.

“That became a defining moment in my realising that there was a possible future and I soon began to enjoy those two hours on a Friday. A man who was attending offered to pick me up as he lived nearby, he was teaching woodwork at the hall.”

From teetering on the brink of suicide Jack began to enjoy life again, participating in more activities, making new friends and getting involved in projects again.

Jack said: “Since that first outing to Oakworth, I have joined Keighley Lions Club and The Lion’s Den Men’s Shed at Cliffe Castle where I have transformed three Koi Carp tanks with a Japanese theme, changed and upgraded all the filtration systems and pipework and when I have felt it has been more that I could physically cope with, new friends at the shed have helped and taken some of the heavier work off me.”

Having turned his life around he is now an inspiration to other lonely people, particularly men.

“I am now passing on my knowledge and know-how to others who have shown an interest, which has helped me feel good in myself. I can also talk with others who are, or have gone through difficult times themselves.”

Allan Clark who volunteers as a Trustee and Secretary for The Lion’s Den, and as an Ambassador for the UK Men’s Sheds Association, said they are literally lifesavers.

“The 'Men's Sheds' is a national movement in Australia, Ireland and the United Kingdom, set up as peer to peer groups of self-help in tackling mental health and well-being, isolation, suicide, loneliness and grief and bereavement.”

Mentored and guided by Andy Ryland, Development Officer at Community First Yorkshire, Allan is helping establish Men’s Sheds by assisting groups in finding suitable premises. A large proportion of the activities involve making things like woodwork, metalwork, modelling, mending or repairing items such as bikes, furniture and more.

Mr Clark said: “Membership grew and we started getting referrals from local GP surgeries and Social Prescribers and, at the time of the pandemic, we were up to a 37 strong membership.”

The group adapted to the pandemic restrictions too as it was important to keep the lifeline open.

“We started working with school groups and ran courses for adults in spoon carving. We had been open for a little over six months when lockdowns happened, so to keep in touch and help members in isolation we formed a book, jigsaw, film and model kit library, which we could take out and engage with members and then carry out a swap when needed.”

The UK Men’s Sheds Association organised a Virtual 'Shed-Fest' this year during the pandemic and one of the segments talked about the philosophy behind the concept.

“If you take 12 men and sit them in a room, then say to them: ‘Talk about yourselves, your families and ailments,’ six will immediately get up and leave, four will head for a corner and the remaining two will have been too slow to find a corner.

“However, if you place a lawnmower in the middle of the room and say to the 12: ‘Any chance you could have a look at this mower as I think there is a problem with it?’ within one hour they will all be on first name terms, know family and will have shared their ailments.

“Men traditionally worked in industry, factories and mills 'Shoulder to Shoulder' and the same applied when relaxing at the pub after work, stood at the bar talking 'shoulder to shoulder' but most of the conversation would be about work, sport and TV, not about anything personal, as that was seen to be taboo in a man’s world.

“This is why sheds are becoming ever so much more popular. In 2013 there were just 30 open in the UK, to date and still growing there are now well over 600, all unique and different in their own right, however with the same underlying principles, to tackle mental health and well-being in men.

“We have more than 40 members now and also more than a dozen women who attend.”

In October 2020 the group signed a lease to occupy approximately a third of the St Michael's Chapel which had been empty for more than 18 years in Bracken Bank.

Activities will include bicycle maintenance, railway modelling, glass-making and an Innovations centre.

“We have been helped so much by Keighley Healthy Living, Cliffe Castle Support Group, Bradford Council Parks Department, Participate, WYCAS and Keighley Social Lights, who have helped donated and taught us how best to create a sustainable resource, for the good of the community.”

The Lion’s Den Shed was awarded the 'Service Excellence Award for Partnership and Collaboration' in October 2020 after only being open for 13 months.

While men disappearing into their sheds is something of a light-hearted cliché it is clear that in these cases the sheds also help them to reappear and start to enjoy life again.

For more information about Men’s Sheds go to mensheds.org.uk

If you are experiencing a mental health crisis and live in Bradford, Airedale, Wharfedale or Craven you can contact First Response on 01274 221181 (24/7).

Struggling with mental health & well being? To speak to a Guide-Line worker, call 08001 884 884. The service is available from 12pm-12am, 7 days a week, 365 days a year (including bank holidays).