This is a public service announcement. In response to a number of calls and e-mails to the offices of the Telegraph & Argus, we can confirm that sightings of a strange, unidentified object in the skies above Bradford are being investigated.

Reports began to filter through earlier this week when people across the district began to see what has been described as “a huge yellow ball” floating high in the sky.

Leeds-Bradford Airport, West Yorkshire Police and The Royal Dirigible and Blimp Corps have confirmed that they have not sent anything answering such a description into the air.

Many people have dismissed the sightings as some kind of mass hallucination, but older members of the population are claiming that the object has been seen before, long in the past, and goes by the name “the sun”.

We have checked in our archives and can indeed find mention of “the sun” in several very ancient reports. According to these archived articles, “the sun” traditionally made regular appearances around this time of year, and very often maintained its position in the sky during the daylight hours sometimes well into September.

Right-wing nationalist parties instantly condemned the sudden reappearance of “the sun”, wanting to know where it has come from, what its intentions are, and whether it is intending to claim benefits and put itself on the council house waiting list.

But other sections of society have welcomed “the sun” and say that its presence in the sky adds a great deal to the landscape of Bradford and – given time – could properly integrate to become a useful and productive fixture in the district. However, a note of caution is sounded.

Firstly, people are advised not to look directly at “the sun”. This is not because it is shy. This is because the sun is, according to leading scientists, a huge ball of flaming gas.

Secondly, “the sun” gives off heat and radiation and stuff, and can turn your skin red. Some suggest that prolonged exposure to “the sun” can give you cancer, and while there may be something in this they also say the same of video games, red lipstick, and brown envelopes. Still, best to slap a bit of lotion on if you’re out.

Thirdly and finally, never, in any circumstances, try to organise any kind of outdoor event on the basis that “the sun” is out and the sky is blue, because it is believed from recent experience that “the sun” is a capricious beast and will immediately disappear if it thinks you want to go to the seaside or attend a gala.

Thus ends the public service announcement. If you want us, we’ll be outside with a hanky on our heads.